I'm digging through a backlog of requests from folks who have been following me and a few I've just answered privately. That said, feel free to send over your communications conundrums to DearMurgatroyd@gmail.com and I'll answer within a week or so.
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Dear Julie:
OMG! You're back! OMG! Thank goodness. Help! I'm the ED of a small nonprofit (3.0 FTE) and THING 1 and THING 2 are at war with one another over seemingly petty and silly things. Here's what I've done so far:
* Sat down with each person, separately and asked for concrete examples that are related to workplace performance, reviewed their job descriptions and let them know that if they can't work this out, they will need to be gone. * Had a follow up meeting with each person and gave them "Three Things to Work On to Improve Relationships" with timelines and check-ins. I also added a weekly "stand up staff meeting" to check in on stuff where I'm present because they don't bicker when I'm in the room. * Wrote a PIP for both and let them know that they won't be able to continue at ORG unless they work this out with my support. * Informed my BC and my VC and included a timeline, and a copy of our Personnel Policy that I'm following to the letter.
Week 1: They were stiffly polite to each other and work got DONE. The quality was amazing and we accomplished more in one week than we had in a month. I praised them both to one another and together and bought lunch as a "thank you for making this a priority" reward.
Week 2: More stiff politeness followed by giving each other the silent treatment which resulted in a work slowdown and more grumbling, eyerolls and "well, I would have gotten it done but ..." comments.
Week 3: Silent treatment continues except for the massive blow out that they just had. I've sent them both home for the day and written them both up for violating their PIPs. I need to update my BC and VC and figure out what to say/do next.
______________________________________________________
Dear Wrangle of Thing 1 and Thing 2:
HR isn't my area of expertise but ... wowza, you have done everything right. We don't know all of the dynamics here but in your message to me you gave me more identifying information which tells me that these two staff members are simply not ever going to get along. It doesn't appear to be related to any of their immutable characteristics, I'm going out on a limb to say that it is either going to take a skilled mediator intervening here or you're going to have to let them both go. (The OP's message indicates that both are equally at fault and both are equally valuable to the organization.)
So here's what you might do:
1. Contact your local mediation organization and hire them to assist you in navigating the situation.
2. Give both staff members a final warning. They are required to participate in mediation with the outside consultant and/or (your call here) adhere to the PIP requirements perfectly for X period of time.
3. Give this two weeks, tops. I'd also tee up job descriptions and job postings to be ready in case one or both of them refuse to participate in mediation and/or adhere to the PIP.
Be prepared. One or both of them may quit in frustration, anger or fear. Part of the reason I'm suggesting bringing in an outside expert is that there *might* be something else going on here but given the information you gave me, I'm thinking no but then again .... I could be wrong.
So here's what you tell people if the mediation and/or PIP compliance period doesn't work:
To community partners: Murgatroyd and Bathsheba were both important parts of ORG during our GENERIC NAME phase of PROJECT and we are grateful to them for all of their contributions. Unfortunately, due to some personality conflicts, it was better for everyone that they both move on to new opportunities elsewhere. We're excited about bringing on a new team and achieving our GOAL OF X with your support.
To your board: Murgatroyd and Bathsheba were both valuable employees who contributed a great deal to ORG. However, the ongoing conflict between them and the impact that it had on workflow, production and funder expectations was so negative that after much counseling, discussion and help from a mediator, they both made the decision that it was time for them to leave ORG.
If it does work (and it might):
To anyone who saw the conflict and/or needs to know: Like any small business or organization, growth and change can be difficult for everyone involved and we are grateful that we were able to engage NAME OF MEDIATION ORG to provide us with the framework and tools to navigate some of the human resource difficulties that come about during times of conflict. They are a great resource for our region and I can tell you that their expertise was exactly what we needed to get through some hard conversations. Now, we're stronger than ever and I think that we have a lot to look forward to.
And that, dear ones, is the Friday Fun post. Have a great weekend!
_____________________________________________________
Dear Julie:
OMG! You're back! OMG! Thank goodness. Help! I'm the ED of a small nonprofit (3.0 FTE) and THING 1 and THING 2 are at war with one another over seemingly petty and silly things. Here's what I've done so far:
* Sat down with each person, separately and asked for concrete examples that are related to workplace performance, reviewed their job descriptions and let them know that if they can't work this out, they will need to be gone. * Had a follow up meeting with each person and gave them "Three Things to Work On to Improve Relationships" with timelines and check-ins. I also added a weekly "stand up staff meeting" to check in on stuff where I'm present because they don't bicker when I'm in the room. * Wrote a PIP for both and let them know that they won't be able to continue at ORG unless they work this out with my support. * Informed my BC and my VC and included a timeline, and a copy of our Personnel Policy that I'm following to the letter.
Week 1: They were stiffly polite to each other and work got DONE. The quality was amazing and we accomplished more in one week than we had in a month. I praised them both to one another and together and bought lunch as a "thank you for making this a priority" reward.
Week 2: More stiff politeness followed by giving each other the silent treatment which resulted in a work slowdown and more grumbling, eyerolls and "well, I would have gotten it done but ..." comments.
Week 3: Silent treatment continues except for the massive blow out that they just had. I've sent them both home for the day and written them both up for violating their PIPs. I need to update my BC and VC and figure out what to say/do next.
______________________________________________________
Dear Wrangle of Thing 1 and Thing 2:
HR isn't my area of expertise but ... wowza, you have done everything right. We don't know all of the dynamics here but in your message to me you gave me more identifying information which tells me that these two staff members are simply not ever going to get along. It doesn't appear to be related to any of their immutable characteristics, I'm going out on a limb to say that it is either going to take a skilled mediator intervening here or you're going to have to let them both go. (The OP's message indicates that both are equally at fault and both are equally valuable to the organization.)
So here's what you might do:
1. Contact your local mediation organization and hire them to assist you in navigating the situation.
2. Give both staff members a final warning. They are required to participate in mediation with the outside consultant and/or (your call here) adhere to the PIP requirements perfectly for X period of time.
3. Give this two weeks, tops. I'd also tee up job descriptions and job postings to be ready in case one or both of them refuse to participate in mediation and/or adhere to the PIP.
Be prepared. One or both of them may quit in frustration, anger or fear. Part of the reason I'm suggesting bringing in an outside expert is that there *might* be something else going on here but given the information you gave me, I'm thinking no but then again .... I could be wrong.
So here's what you tell people if the mediation and/or PIP compliance period doesn't work:
To community partners: Murgatroyd and Bathsheba were both important parts of ORG during our GENERIC NAME phase of PROJECT and we are grateful to them for all of their contributions. Unfortunately, due to some personality conflicts, it was better for everyone that they both move on to new opportunities elsewhere. We're excited about bringing on a new team and achieving our GOAL OF X with your support.
To your board: Murgatroyd and Bathsheba were both valuable employees who contributed a great deal to ORG. However, the ongoing conflict between them and the impact that it had on workflow, production and funder expectations was so negative that after much counseling, discussion and help from a mediator, they both made the decision that it was time for them to leave ORG.
If it does work (and it might):
To anyone who saw the conflict and/or needs to know: Like any small business or organization, growth and change can be difficult for everyone involved and we are grateful that we were able to engage NAME OF MEDIATION ORG to provide us with the framework and tools to navigate some of the human resource difficulties that come about during times of conflict. They are a great resource for our region and I can tell you that their expertise was exactly what we needed to get through some hard conversations. Now, we're stronger than ever and I think that we have a lot to look forward to.
And that, dear ones, is the Friday Fun post. Have a great weekend!
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